vampire withdrawl.

things worth noting:

1. i finished it. it's done. no more vampire love in my life. i am going through serious withdrawl. (i promise not to make fun of your books so much stephenie meyer if you'll just write me another one...)

2. last week i babysat a 2 year old for a friend of a friend and was having serious identity issues everytime we walked out the door to head to play group or walk along the beach or go to the playground. as i pushed the stroller and said things way too enthusiastically like "wow, it's a nice day out here, isn't it william!" or when i started referring to myself in third person like "don't pull Carolyn's coat, that belongs to Carolyn", i started to have these moments of horror that people would think i was a mom. i'm not sure why this bothered me so much, but the thought of being looked at through the "she's a mom, look at her kid, CUTE!" filter made me want to wear a big t-shirt that said..."stop looking at me that way. i'm just the babysitter." it all came to a head when i was walking with william down by the lake and i passed a guy running and he looked at the kid, looked at me, winked, and while giving me a big thumbs up said "WAY TO GO MOM!!!!" i turned in panic, trying to spit the words out in time as he ran past..."I'M NOT A MOM!!! I'M NOT A MOM!!! I'M JUST THE BABYSITTER!!!" but my words trailed off into the wind like my lingering sense of self.

3. friday night we went out, and while eating thai and sushi and throwing back the glasses of wine, this old guy right next to us started choking. like, serious choking. a guy at another table had to give him the heimlich maneuver until he finally threw up whatever he was choking on. SCARY! what was even scarier was the lack of emotion and effort put forth by the thai waiters and waitresses. it's like you could just see it in their eyes as it was happening..."that's gonna be bad for bussiness..." they even somehow managed to deliver our crab rangoons in the midst of it all. priorities people. priorities. dying people first. apetizers second.

counting down.

100 pages to go. the plot has thickened...dun dun DUN!

to quote my friend cara: "I read the 4th book of Twilight in one day...I can't decide if its because I was just that into it or if I was just that sick of it and wanted to get it over with."

my thoughts: i can't decide if i'm dragging this out because i never want it to end or because my eyes can only handle so much rolling a day before i get a headache.

(confession: still so entertained! damn you stephenie meyer!)

the carolyn saga part...

alright ok FINE katy i'll tell you what's going on in my life!

the reason i've been MIA recently is because i, well, you see, have been, sort of, well the thing is...sigh. i flew to england, moved into a flat in london, went to some interviews, got the flu for two days, went to some more interviews, moved out of my flat in london to ali's brother and sister-in-law's place in reading, spent a week and a half figuring out what ali and i should do with our lives and had one of those michael w. smith moments where we just wanted to find "our place in this world...our PLAAAACE in this world" and got on a plane and flew back to chicago last night.

please, everyone, cut me a break. things went down. life is hard sometimes.

what else do i need to say really? many of you may be thinking..."UH...LOTS more"...but, well, to be quite frank, i don't want to. so, i'm in chicago now, ali's coming soon, and we'll probably be here for a couple of months before we make the next move.

and because i don't feel like talking about the heavy things of life anymore, let's move on to something lighter...twilight series. book 4: breaking dawn. i have a similiar feeling about the twilight series that i have about watching lost...WHY DID I EVER START!?!?!? it sucks you in and when it starts turning rubbish it's too late to go back. i can barely get through a page anymore without spouting out in astonishment and disgust.."really!?!? really stephenie meyer?!? this is the direction you decided to take this series?!? really!?!" anyway. i'll get through it. (confession: i'm still entertained.)

i see london...almost...

so....

tomorrow i'm heading back to chicago. bringing kristin and grant a new car to replace their poor dying toyota, then a couple of days with the chicagoans, and thursday at 6:05 pm i'm flying to london. again. but this time i get to stay. :)

it's crazy how as soon as you leap over one hurdle, you are simply faced with several more hurdles to get past. the morning after ali and i found out about our visa, he lost his job due to this blasted economic crisis, leaving us both with a very blank state as we start this new chapter of our lives! don't get me wrong, i'm all WHOOP WHOOP about the visa, but finding a job, a place to live, and trying to squeeze yourself a space in the world can be kind of scary. i'm already on the look out for people renting rooms from flats and houses in london, and i've applied for about a thousand jobs already (i just want to teach music to little kids! please london, give me a job!) so hopefully things will start falling into place for both of us eventually. at least we can be together!

drum roll please...

I GOT MY VISA!!!!!

i am leaving on thursday, february 5. i'll get to england on friday, february 6. exactly ONE YEAR after the day ali and i met. coincidence? i think not. one year of crazy rollercoasterness, and we can finally breathe and have a normal relationship and not think about our futures for a VERY LONG TIME!!!! i can get a job again! i get to unpack my suitcase! i can make friends!

i really can't believe it. i thought this day would never come. YEEEEEHAW!!!!!!!!!!

bellannoying.

movies watched:

#5. American Teen - a documentary on...well...american teens. :) they keep track of 4 seniors throughout their year in a warsaw, indiana, a small midwest town where the only thing more sacred than basketball is God! sound familiar? it was, unfortunately, all too realistic. oh, the cruelty of high school! everyone is so lost and insecure and trying to find their way. they charted four steriotypical teens through their senior year as they face the drama and emotions of high school--the jock, the popular rich girl, the rebel girl, and geeky band boy. so...which one were you? rated: 4 out of 5 stars

#6. Supersize Me - another documentary i'm afraid! on the horrors of fast food and the growing obesity epedemic in our countries. i was so grossed out as i watched the guy do his experiment of eating mcdonalds 3 times a day for a month that i found myself googling organic vegetarian recipes towards the end. i'm never eating fast food again. rated: 3 1/2 out of 5 stars

my other accomplishment of the week was finishing eclipse, the third book of the twilight series, this morning. i'm not sure why, but i couldn't help but be annoyed. i won't give too much away for the sake of you potetial readers, but bella swan, the main character, officially drives me crazy! "who should i chose, the vampire or the warewolf?!?!? vampire or warewolf?!?!? oh my gosh i fell again!" just MAKE UP YOUR MIND AND STOP FALLING DOWN!

no visa news yet. :( i'm trying not to think about it every second of every day. impossible i'm afraid.

who's your baby mama?

so i've come back to iowa to stay with my parents for a bit, and in order to fill my time (and more accurately try desperately hard not to think about time at all), i have signed up for netflix and have watched at least one movie every day since. here's my runing list:

#1. la vie en rose -- about edith piaf. sort of depressing b/c her life was sort of depressing.
#2. leon -- an oldie but a goodie! i saw about 2 seconds of it one day when it was on tv in korea,
and now i finally got around to watching it! i think it's natalie portman's first movie ever
#3. shine a light -- the new martin scorsese film about the rolling stones. SOOOO good. it totally
made me want to be in a rock band / go see the rolling stones immediately / be
best friends with keith richards.
#4. baby mama -- thanks to this movie, i had a dream last night that i moved to england, and
met woman, identitical to tina fey, named tina, and her best friend, identical to amy poehler,
named fey. and they totally loved me. and then tina bought an apartment and we all moved
in together. and then these irish guys that i hung out with in thailand were suddenly in a flat
down the road, and i went between my friends tina and fey and the irish boys all day. my life
was so complete!

anyway, so that's where i'm at so far with the movie list. and i'm on book 3 of twilight! :) movies and books--it's what's keeping my afloat!